Farewell Tour – New Shows Announced!!27th January, 2016

We’re determined to make our farewell lap of Australia/NZ the single biggest tour we’ve ever embarked upon! To that end, we’re announcing a handful of new dates with shows in Canberra, Alice Springs, Wollongong, the Victorian snowfields, and more. PLUS We’ve announced that our final ever show will be hold in our home town of Adelaide on October 28th. All the dates below or head to the tour page to grab your ticket.

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An Open Letter To Music Fans (and Beard Enthusiasts)21st January, 2016

Recently, we, The Beards, have announced that we will be ending our touring and live performing career with a farewell tour in 2016. The fact that we have had a touring and live performing career at all has surprised many, including ourselves. The fact that we can go out on our own terms with a farewell tour such as this is something we are deeply grateful for. And it would be remiss of us if we didn’t offer a genuine and heartfelt thankyou to everyone who has made the last ten years of beard-related madness possible.
 
As few people other than those who have attempted to do it will understand, the personal, financial and emotional sacrifices necessary to make a living as an unsigned original touring band catch up with you eventually. Whilst being on stage in front of all of you can be the most awesome job in the world, we feel that now is the right time to (hopefully) go out with a bang with one last tour, rather than slowly fade from relevance until we’re nothing but a quirky answer to a 2011 Hottest 100 quiz question.
 
Being a novelty band (and we’re not afraid to admit it), we faced an uphill battle from the start in many respects –we’ve had precious little radio play over the journey, the majority of festivals didn’t want to know about us, and most self-respecting music fans would screw up their nose at the idea, at least until they saw us live. And so to win people over, we toured. Then we toured more. Then we toured again, until people began to take notice. That’s the reality we faced, as do many young bands that start out with nothing but a glint in their eye and a station wagon that they borrowed from their drummer’s dad.
 
Let’s be clear, none if this is sour grapes. The experiences we’ve had, the friends we’ve made, the sold-out gigs we’ve played in European cities that we can’t even pronounce – we wouldn’t change any of it. We all know bands and musos who would give their left nut to have the career that we’ve had and we’re exceedingly lucky that from the start, there were enough of you – fans, other bands, managers, booking agents – that believed in us and believed in what we were trying to do. To those of you who got behind us, we can’t thank you enough. For those who didn’t get it or didn’t want to buy in, we’re sorry you missed out.
 
As funny as it sounds now, we didn’t start this project because of a love of beards. Our passion was, and still is, a desire to do something fun, something left of centre, something that satisfied our warped senses of humour. Also, we had a hunch that just maybe, if we poured enough passion in and crafted the concept just right, something as absurd as a band that sings entirely and exclusively about beards might just end up being something great.
 
Did we succeed? Depends who you ask. Did we have fun? Hell yes. And do we owe it all to anyone who ever bought a T-shirt, sung along to one of our songs, forwarded on one of our videos, or stood in the crowd with a beer in their hand and a smile on their face? Abso-fucking-lutely.
We’ll see you out on the road as we go around one more time – we’ll be doing our best to get to as many places as possible and hang out with as many of you as we can. And once again, from the bottom of our hearts, thankyou all.
 
Much love,
 
The Beards

We’re Quitting Touring in 2016 – Farewell Tour Announced6th December, 2015

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The day has arrived! After 10 years, 4 studio albums, 56 songs about beards, and way too many shows, beers and beard strokes to count, we are hanging up our touring hat indefinitely in 2016. Don’t panic just yet though – before we call it a day we’re embarking on one more MASSIVE farewell tour to say thankyou to everyone who’s come out to support beards over the years. Tickets are onsale now, and you can check out the dates below – more shows will be announced soon but for now here they are…

Wed 20 Jan – WEST TAMWORTH LEAGUES, TAMWORTH COUNTRY MUSIC FESTIVAL NSW

Sat 06 Feb – HOUGHTONFEST, HOUGHTON SA

Sat 13 Feb – MEATSTOCK, SYDNEY SHOWGROUNDS NSW

Thu 25 Feb – ROYAL OAK HOTEL, LAUNCESTON TAS

Fri 26 Feb – WARATAH HOTEL, HOBART TAS

Sat 27 Feb – RED HOT MUSIC, DEVONPORT TAS

Fri 11 Mar – BAR INDIGO (LEISURE INN), ROCKINGHAM WA

Sat 12 Mar – ROSEMOUNT HOTEL, PERTH WA

Sun 13 Mar – WINTERSUN HOTEL, GERALDTON WA

Fri 15 Apr – BODEGA, WELLINGTON NZ

Sat 16 Apr – KINGS ARMS TAVERN, AUCKLAND NZ

Wed 20 Apr – PIER HOTEL, ESPERANCE WA

Thu 21 Apr – THE WHITE STAR, ALBANY WA

Fri 22 Apr – DUNSBOROUGH TAVERN, DUNSBOROUGH WA

Sat 23 Apr – PRINCE OF WALES, BUNBURY WA

Wed 11 May – GLADSTONE EVENTS CENTRE, GLADSTONE QLD

Thu 12 May – LIONLEIGH HOTEL, ROCKHAMPTON QLD

Fri 13 May – MAGNUM’S, AIRLIE BEACH QLD

Sat 14 May – DALRYMPLE HOTEL, TOWNSVILLE QLD

Sun 15 May – THE JACK, CAIRNS QLD

Sat 21 May – JIVE BAR, ADELAIDE SA

Wed 25 May – THE LOFT, WARRNAMBOOL VIC

Thu 26 May – THE GOLDEN VINE, BENDIGO VIC

Fri 27 May – SS & A CLUB, ALBURY NSW

Sat 28 May – THE AREA HOTEL, GRIFFITH NSW

Thu 9 Jun – RAILWAY CLUB, DARWIN NT

Fri 10 Jun – RAILWAY CLUB, DARWIN NT

Sat 11 Jun – KATHERINE HOTEL, KATHERINE NT

Wed 15 Jun – THE SPOTTED COW, TOOWOOMBA QLD

Thu 16 Jun – THE SOUNDLOUNGE, GOLD COAST QLD

Fri 17 Jun – SOL BAR, MAROOCHYDORE QLD

Sat 18 Jun – THE TRIFFID, BRISBANE QLD

Thu 23 Jun – KAROVA LOUNGE, BALLARAT VIC

Fri 24 Jun – THE BARWON CLUB, GEELONG VIC

Sat 25 Jun – CORNER HOTEL, MELBOURNE VIC

Thu 30 Jun – BEACHCOMBER HOTEL, TOUKLEY NSW

Fri 01 Jul – THE CAMBRIDGE HOTEL, NEWCASTLE NSW

Sat 02 Jul – THE METRO, SYDNEY NSW

I’m Growing a Beard Downstairs for Christmas!25th November, 2015

unnamed1Yes! It’s the new Christmas duet featuring the very pro-beard Kate Miller-Heidke and the even more pro-beard Beards’ frontman Johann Beardraven. Not only is it destined to be this festive season’s biggest hit, it’s also raising money for Decembeard – donate through the website and you can download the song! Go to http://www.decembeard.org.au/ChristmasSingle – you’ll be helping spread Christmas cheer AND helping stop the spread of bowel cancer. Win!

 

Happy Ten Year Anniversary To Us!1st November, 2015

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Big big thanks to everyone who came out to help us celebrate 10 years in style. For those of you who missed out, fear not – we’ve got some big announcements coming up soon and we’ll definitely be hitting the road again some time in 2016 to share the beard love once again. You can also catch us in Sydney on November 7th at Fisher’s Gig in Campbelltown. In the meantime, keep on thinking about beards with this informative list of beard facts…

 

-The average beard contains over 30,000 hairs

-If a man never once shaved in his lifetime, his beard would grow to an average length of 8 metres

-9 of The Colonel’s 11 secret herbs and spices were extracted from his own beard

-Facey McStubblington’s beard is insured for over $1.5 million

-Your beard protects you from harmful UV rays

-Your beard keeps growing after you die

-John Beardman Jr has a painfully large penis

-If you don’t have a beard you can fuck right off

 

For more useful beard information make sure you’re across our facebook and twitter